The Disney cliché, as overplayed as it might be, rings true for a lot of things in life. Many times we just need to let things go.
It's a new month now and I am entering my fourth full week here in Bangkok. Last week was probably my best week yet, not only because the pace of life picked up a little but also because my emotional and mental wellbeing were in the best place they've been yet. As each week passes by, I feel more settled, more at home, and more in a routine here. As much as I complain about life getting monotonous and wanting change and adventure, it's nice, reaching that point. As human beings, we do well with structure... for the most part.
I'll be honest with you. It's been hard letting go of my "past life" - relationships, hobbies, etc. - that used to be prevalent in my life but are not anymore, simply because I live in a country and culture vastly different from my own. I haven't even been here for a month yet, so I am certainly doing my best to extend grace towards myself - it's O.K. to struggle when we're transitioning and adjusting to a new way of life. Heck, it's O.K. to struggle period. The reality is, however, that I can't hang onto those things - the things of my "past life" - forever. My life is here, in Bangkok, now. Although it does not mean forgetting about or writing off people and things from back home, it does mean things are going to look different and will continue to look different as time goes on. Although my body got here in 19 hours, my soul is taking a good, long while to catch up to it. The physical journey is short compared to the journey the soul takes to get somewhere new, let alone a new country and culture.
I'll be honest - I miss a lot of things from back home. I miss my friends. I miss my family. I miss having a substantial social life and going out on weekends. I miss having a gym membership and being able to eat whatever I want, when I want. I miss good coffee. I miss air conditioning. I miss having a real bed. The list goes on.
It may not be bad in and of itself to miss these things - it's entirely human to experience feelings of longing. What I need to be careful of, however, is letting these things cause me to miss out on my life here because I am too preoccupied with home and the things there that I miss. At some point, I need to move on and just let them go.
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Rather than overwhelm myself with myriad blogs and updates about each and every detail and thought regarding my new life here in Bangkok, I've decided to do fewer, more meaningful updates as they come to mind. I'll never be able to capture the entirety of my experiences here in words, written or spoken, but that's O.K. Really, that's the reality and beauty of life itself. The human experience is most meaningful when it transcends words.
Bear with me these next two years. It's going to be a wild ride.
